Bruce Chandler

Most people are not conceived in a test tube. Bruce Chandler is no exception, so the rumors are untrue –the ones about how he put a crack in the glass tube with his first effort at mitosis. The mitosis itself was successful, and Bruce now has many cells, so he did become good at dividing, but the idea that he was a prodigy is difficult to prove. It is also hard to disprove, given the thriving multi-cellular organism he has become. But my point is that there was no test tube. Bruce is from Kentucky. They didn’t have test-tubes there in the late 60s. Bruce was born without any shoes, calling into question the old spiritual that claims “all God’s children got shoes,” but that could still be true, assuming Bruce isn’t one of God’s children. But his mother was grateful in any case (about the bare feet).

Bruce had too much energy as a child. He would release it by beating with hands and feet on horizontal and vertical surfaces, and even some with obtuse angles. This tested the patience of his long-suffering family, at least until the invention of electronic drum pads and headphones (which came too late, but better late than never). In 1974, he wrote “Born to Drum,” which Springsteen shamelessly adapted without crediting his fellow Bruce for the idea. And Chandler still has more cells than Springsteen, by about 17% (give or take, depending on what was for lunch).

There were bands of course. One doesn’t get to be the drummer of WRS without the support of other bands. They have requested that they not be named on this website, but there were quite a few, take my word, and their desire to remain anonymous is commendable. Eventually there was college for Bruce at Murray State University, which is “Kentucky’s Public Ivy,” according to their website, and the obtrusive signs hanging all over campus. This is not Bruce’s fault. Murray State was content to be a po-dunk school when he went there. There aren’t enough po-dunk schools anymore. Everything is now Ivy League, by some sort of analogy or qualification. For example, Austin Community College is “The Yale of Community Colleges between I-35 and Red River Blvd,” according to their website. Bruce never went there.

Have I mentioned that Bruce is a recording engineer and erstwhile producer? Well he is, regardless of what was for lunch. He plays keyboards when he’s in the mood (for playing keyboards). And he designs websites, takes pictures, and of course, there is mitosis. A horse would have to eat Bruce’s resumé very carefully to keep from choking on it. He moved to Texas in 2005, taking the resumé, but not the horse (which belonged to a neighbor). The move made his family very proud. He took up with a lot of people his family doesn’t know, mainly musicians, including many at the Kerrville Folk Festival where Bruce heads the Recording Krew, and some refugees from Pennsylvania called Buffalo Breath, who eventually moved home to vote for Obama. Now it’s WRS or nothing. These days Bruce shaves more or less regularly.